Friday, March 28, 2008

The Ties that Bind


No matter what happens in life between to people, when they share a child there is an enduring tie that binds. You may not agree in principle with them or see life though the same eyes, but you decide to bridge the divide and in doing so you give peace to the one created together; you love more than each other and more than yourself.

I am writing today from Jackson. Evan is sleeping soundly and lunch is ready for his Daddy. Laundry is going and bottles are freshly filled. There is a man here in a great deal of pain - a man I love as my own family - a man who I made a family with.

Although we are moving forward simply as friends, I cherish this relationship and I will nurture it as I do all those who matter to me. Greg's mothers cancer has returned and we do not know the amount of time she has left. Evan's Nanny has fought breast cancer into remission last July, only to have it return to her now. I ask for your prayers for the family, and for Rose G. she is the kindest person with a heart of gold and humility like you have never known. She is the center of Greg's family, as a mother should be, and she is my sweet Evan's paternal Grandmother. I want her to spend as much time with him as she has left and I want to bring some measure of comfort to Greg during this time in whatever way I can.

It has been a long year for us - both of us. We wondered why our son came to us. Why now? Was that the sole reason for our meeting? I can tell you now that I believe that Evan was sent as a healing balm and a source of abiding love for Greg and the timing of his birth and Greg's love for him is a testament to the ties we share - and they are the ties that bind and will help see us through the next chapter.

Love,
Ladybug

6 comments:

Lori said...

cancer is a devastating disease and can bring so much pain to a family. I know this from experience and don't like to revisit that place.

A prayer for Rose and for strength and peace during this time for both her and for Greg.

Blessings to you all.

Tim said...

My prayers go out to you, Evan, Greg and his family.

I'm glad to read that you and Greg are doing the best you can to be loving parents for Evan, even if you and he are moving on as friends. I can relate to this. It's never easy, but the effor for the kids sake is so worth it.

Cheryl said...

I'm so sorry, Mellissa. I'll be praying for your family.

Anonymous said...

Prayers will go up, my friend... for all of you.

bricotrout said...

i just remebered you had told me you were back. sorry i hadnt come by earlier. i am glad to know you arent experiencing the kind of contempt and disgust with your 'partner' that i have endured. the way you described an inate bond seems to be much more in line with how things should be.
btw, os is looking for you. let me know if you want me to forward you his email.

Rebecca said...

What a beautiful family photo. Family isn't always bound by ties that are tangible; they're bound by ties of the heart. This is why sometimes our friends are our true sisters, aunts and mothers.

I will keep Greg's mother in my thoughts, and best wishes to you all.

Fondly,
Rebecca