Holding Up A Little Mirror

I cannot imagine what it must be like, the pride one must feel when looking at their child. Especially when the child is a mirror image of your own face. I met someone recently that was the exact replica of their father. It was such an amazing likeness that I am still pondering on it in amazement.

I just keep thinking about the wonder of looking across the room into a mirror of yourself. Sometimes it is physical, sometimes it is the actions that are the same, but I gotta tell you - I think that would be about the best confirmation and the biggest release of love ever felt.

I know you parents out there get tired and have to deal with little attitudes and messes and financial stuff and fears and a bag load of stuff....but when it all feels like too much - think of my words, and look across the room into that little mirror of yourself....and say "thank you"....God gave you the greatest gift he could. Lucky you!

Ladybug

Flashbacks

There was a thin gold chain and vision that worked well up close, but not far away. There was one foot, then two and of course shoulders and an elbow that needed tending. There was a mark left, or was it two? There was a lack of patience in general as gifts were exchanged - they both really liked what the other gave them and said so in simple words and sweeping gestures.

The day melded with Cub scouts and a cheerleader who gives a great hug, a little playhouse on the church grounds, some bar-b-q with slaw and a story about the long walk to school and a first love.

There was a spot up high where the stars were playing hide and seek with those who bore witness to the game. For a moment high school was back in the forefront and the songs that played were like old friends stopping by to say hello.

Dark chocolate and coconut, being honest and just spending time - it was a perfect Saturday. The real kind....and did I mention those gifts...thank you...

Mellissa

The Same Today

I remember when I was five years old and a kindergarten student at Hobe Sound Bible Academy in Florida where I grew up. My teacher was Mrs. Marjorie Brown and I loved her like my own mother. She has remained a constant force in the back of my mind and was one of the models of love and learning in my life. She taught me to read sentences and form my letters, big and small and gave me my first Beeka book – it had an owl on the cover. I loved that time in my life. I was a tall girl, even for five years old and wore my hair in two braids. I think I was the child who was the helper, even back then.

One day, my brother Samuel, who is three years older than me, forgot his lunch in the car when my mother dropped us off for school. I remember him saying it out loud when she pulled away. We were ushered to our classrooms, mine far away from his, as the kindergarten was housed in the chapel area about a half-mile from the main campus of the Bible College. By the time I arrived to my classroom, the weight of thinking that my brother would not eat that day was too heavy for a little girl to carry and I was crying inconsolably. I was too young to know that lunch could come from other sources than my mother and that my brother would be fed from the cafeteria that day with the other third graders. I explained the situation to Mrs. Brown through my crocodile tears and shaking shoulders. I loved my brother so much and could not go on with the day until I knew that he would have food. I told her that I needed to go to him, to share my lunch with him so that we would not go without.

Mrs. Brown walked with me the half-mile to his classroom, comforting me each step of the way with assurances that we would help him and that all would be well. I needed to give him my offering in person. No messenger would do. I needed to see for myself that he would be well.

We arrived at our destination and my brother was called outside so I could share half of everything with him. When I saw him and provided enough to cover his needs the smile returned to my face and the little girl with the Laura Ingles braids could return to life again knowing that the one she loved was cared for and well.

In a lot of ways, that is exactly the person I am today. Not only to my brother, whom I still love with an amazing clarity, but to others. It was said somewhere that I love with conditions, and that is partly true, we are human after all, are we not? However, my only condition for love is that it be returned to me and that it be cared for by those I entrust it to. I love that God made me with a tender heart and a soft spirit. I also love that he made me with a backbone and has taught me through his words that love is patient, love is kind, love flaunts not itself and is not puffed up.

I try to carry that into my relationships with others and I pride myself on the way I conduct myself with honor and fidelity and compassion to those I love. I try to put myself last in the face of the needs of others – after all, I am blessed far more than I deserve to be. God has provided amazing blessings in my life and I am going to hold on to that, hold my head high and never hide my light under a bush! I am an amazing woman, full of love and compassion and good will to others. I am a catch, I realize my worth, and I thank God for making me this person. I am proud to say it out loud, because it is through God’s grace that I am this woman – he made me in his image and I am blown away by his love for me and for thinking enough of me to give me the special gifts I possess.

Third Time's' a Charm

Isn't it fun to be smitten??
I smile to myself
As the words become written.

Guess all you want
Call me a tease...
Tell me to spill it...
It won't help...
Or will it??

No, I think not
I'll just let you sit
And think on my words
While I smile on for a bit....

If I Could

If I could find the words I would say them to you.
But how well I think you know this already.
If I could find the time I would spend it with you.
Holding hands and walking among the trees.

If I could fly I would circle the clouds around you.
And dream a thousand dreams of life beside you.
Waking only for a kiss and to feel you there again.
But how well I think you know this already.

If I could control time I would slow it.
And turn it back to warmer days.
When daylight lingered to dance longer
With the approaching nightfall.

Oh, If only I could....
But how well I think you know this already.

Future Prescription and The Bachelor

It is Monday night - YES, you KNOW what that means.....I will get to see the Bachelor in Paris in all its 2 hours of splendor and catty women with fake intentions. Yipee!! It is raining and I have just put a Stouffer's French Bread Pizza in the oven and made Maggie some ground beef and rice for dinner and we are hanging in our kitchen together being cozy and happy.

O.K. Now I gotta share. I have four brands of jeans that I am pretty ga-ga over and feel have the best fit, etc. I have tried the more reasonable approach like GAP, Old Navy, Levis, etc. but no go!! My fav's are Citizen's of Humanity, Big Star, Christopher Blue and Future Prescription.

So tonight I am digging around in Filene's Basement (a discount store) and lo and behold - THE SCORE. I find FRx (Future Prescription) for $39.99 - people that is 5 times less than the store price!!! So I am like running to the dressing room with my little cuties in hand and I strip down ready for the ah-ha moment that will preclude me buying like 6 pairs in a wave of retail therapy...and then I get to the pull the jeans over your butt moment and something feels really weird....what the....hmmm what is in the pants I am thinking as I put my hand down the backside of the jeans.....it is like this weird split girdle butt pad thingy in built into the pants. I am really freaked by this, not to mention dissapointed in general. So I go back out and look at all the pants they have and sure enough - they all have this "miracle" hiney in them. It is this contraption that is supposed to lift and separate and give you like a J-Lo booty. I have a momentary panic - that like padded bras (yuck) padded jeans will be the wave of the future!!!! Then I realize with great relief - that is why they were $39.99 - it was a fashion NO NO!!

Anyway, all my hopes and dreams of my big jean score in the sky were dashed forever. So If I want my jeans and my own butt in the back - I am still going to have to pay full retail and that is the disappointment of my week!!

I know - really pitiful post - but hey, it's my life people!!! 30 Minutes left until I go to Paris to see my boyfriend ;-)

Ladybug

Me & Maggie

Me and my little girl bud are back in Atlanta for the week. I have been spending most of the last three weeks or so out in the country at Jim's house and only driving into the city for appointments, etc.

But now I am back in the city in my town home and Maggie is back on a leash for walks and it just doesn't feel as good.

The house does not smell so much like me. It is annoyed that I have abandoned it so it is giving off a little musty "attitude."

I woke up this morning and felt that the light doesn't filter in quite the same way as it does when all there is around you are trees and expansive sky and windows that soar from floor to ceiling.

I woke up this morning and watched Maggie chase after a squirrel, feeling her "country dog" roots for a a bit before realizing that I needed to get her quickly before she was in any danger of going towards the street. We both had forgotten for a moment and I watched the bounce leave her step as she agreed to accept the sound of the long black leash clicking on her collar again, limiting the distance in which she could express her joy of being outside.

My niece will arrive on Thursday from our home in Florida and will spend Spring Break with her Grandmother in North Carolina, relaxing around the lake and learning to sew. I am in town to greet her at the airport with Mother and to spend some time with them and I am soo looking forward to our weekend together in town as there is so much to do and to see in the city, and Spring is flirting with us, showing just enough to entice us to want more.

I am not sure when I will find my way back to the country, but I know that I will miss it, and the man that owns that little piece of heaven.

Love,
Mellissa

Little Rays of Light

It is Sunday afternoon in Atlanta and the skies are blue and the sun is shining. Maggie is outside chewing her new bone and I have just returned home from teaching....

Today I spent an hour with 4 little rays of light. Sebastain, Tobi, Will and Jack (O'lantern) and we learned about using our resources to do the best we can each day. We talked and sang and danced and hugs were freely given to the teacher :-) Tobi had to sit on my lap and hold me and play with my jewelry and Jack kept beaming his toothless grin as we sang Your Love is Deep (my favorite) and learned lessons about doing the best you can with what is available to you.

I have had a wonderful weekend, filled with friends and laughter and support. Kendra, Allison, Jamie, Kerri, Angie, Kimberley - what a group of fun. Forging new friendships and nurturing deeper relationships with a few of these women is my joy right now. It is good to have girlfriends again and to meet up and laugh away the hours together, comparing notes, telling stories and being supportive of our individual needs.

My conversations of the weekend were confirmed to me today through teaching. You see - I am using my resources to do the best I can today. I feel blessed and light and on the road again. I know there will be twists and turns along the way, but I have found my resources again and am walking with a loving Father who watches over me.

This day is a blessing. I hope your Sunday is wonderful as well!

Ladybug