Some things in life just kind of amaze me. First of all, I don't fall for that whole "Whoa is me, I need to talk about my marriage" line. Let me go back a little by saying that I have a co-worker that wants to talk about his marriage issues at work (with me) and I just don't agree with it.
I wonder sometimes if men thing women are really that stupid, and I wonder sometimes if a lot of women are that stupid (yes, I know - I am rolling my eyes too...) to sit and become a web for someone who has woven areas of simple truths into a lot of no so simple feelings that they are looking to "cast" about somewhere.
Here is the advice that got slung yesterday - as am tired of being approached about this topic. Mind you my stance is number 1 - I am not a therapist or expert in marriage, 2. I am not stupid and I am truly not interested in hearing your lament. 3. I have a job to do and since you make like four times what I do, I suggest you go see a therapist!! Now the advice....if you can call it that.
Man - "I need to talk about my wife...."
Me - "Well then go talk to her - about her and you and get it all out on the table and be honest and tell her what's going on with you and show her who you really are. Oh, and by the way, don't be surprised if eventually SHE is the one who hits you with the bombshell that she has found another man and is leaving you. You might think you are the one holding the mid-life crises reigns here and withholding intimacy from your wife - but I am here to tell you pal, that even nice girls have affairs if they are getting no love and attention from home. The first man who comes along and will give her that will be the one who takes your prize. Think of it that way instead of your way...now I suggest if you want to know about your wife or talk about your wife, you leave the kids at grandmas house, go get a bottle of wine and get your wife and start talking....I'm not a therapist nor am I a fly....."
He abruptly turned and left my office. Maybe I should become a therapist and start a tough love boot camp for stupid men...and women. I'd be my first client ;-)
Have a great day everyone. It's off to Jury Duty for me!
Bug
3 comments:
You sure pack a strong statement into such a quick response. It was good to not open that door, even causal conversation can become attached with misplaced emotions.
I tend to be pretty straightforward about things like that. I was nice, but I really do believe that women and men need to be honest and upfront about who they are and what they need - not to everyone but their partner, but most importantly TO their partner.
It is a simple matter of respect and boundaries.
Bug
I think that's the best advice he'll ever get and FOR FREE!!! You said the word 'TOUGH LOVE'.
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