Tomorrow

I will sit with you again tomorrow. You will have the notepad and I will have words. I will do just fine for a while until you ask a question that hits a raw spot. I will fight back tears and try to answer you. The tears will win the fight again and I will apologize to you for no reason at the onset.

Fifty minutes at a time we excavate and I know it is helpful, but scraping away the layers is tedious and it hurts at times. I hate that you see through me. I am so used to showing one thing and not being discovered; people take face value too often. Not you.

I have been doing the homework that you assign to me and at times find myself wanting to go back to my cheat-sheet, to the easy way of answering the questions - but I don't. I simply pull out the dictionary and look up the meaning and try to understand it.

We are three layers in and a fourth layer removal is coming tomorrow. I guess it is appropriate as this is the season of renewal. Thank you for helping me tend my garden and prepare my soil, one layer at a time.